Weight and Me- book review of Women , Food and God

I am a person that has struggled with my weight since 1972. Well as of 2010 I am through with killing myself almost literally to be something my body is not meant to be. I have undergone a very dangerous gastric bypass 16 years ago and I did maintain a 150 pound weight loss, but also had to have a revision to "update" and "repair" it, that was a huge mistake. I almost died, and have had to undergo yet another surgery this past month to cut away adhesion's that have made my life a living hell for the past almost three years.
I think I need to write a book about gastric bypass called he "The Truth and Nothing But". I will never work for another weight loss program that includes a surgery such as I had. Many issues such as developing adhesion's, blood sugar that is uncontrollable and drops like a stone. The surgery is touted as a way to reverse diabetes the thing that is not told is that it makes you hypoglycemic after a period of time. It took a few years but it has caused pancreatitis that I would not wish on an ex-husband.
A Lap-Band I could agree with in a limited way and if it is by a a surgeon that has morals and ethics. Unfortunately many I know have neither, it is all about the money, just a cattle call, take the money and run.
One thing after all these years I have learned is no matter what you do to the stomach , cut it in half, staple, or squeeze it so you can barely swallow spit, nothing will work if you do not work on the part of the body that lays in the area right between your ears.
Most weight issues myself and hundreds of people I have worked with through several surgical weight loss programs basically all have the same issues. Yes we like to eat, but we also are dealing with issues or more to the fact are NOT dealing with issues from as far back as childhood.
I recently read a book by the name of "Women, Food and God. "  I think it had the biggest effect on me than any other book on weight loss I have ever read and I have read a great deal of them.
Since reading this book , when I feel like I want something to eat, my thought is "Why do I want this?" Am I hungry? Am I bored? Am I lonely? Am I depressed? Am I stressed out? Am I worried? If the answer is anything but TRUE hunger I find something more productive to take the place of eating. I crocket, I read, write emails, go for a walk or just go outside in the sunshine.
Being so far from my family and lifelong friends is really hard. The only people I know in the state I live in are people I work with and my husband. I am truly blessed to have my husband. He is a true gift.
He is the most understanding kind, and giving person I have ever known. I kissed a load of toads before I found the Prince believe me!
I have lost 10 pounds since reading the book and I am not on a diet I am just thinking more about my reasons for eating. As a person that had a VERY dysfunctional family and still does my skills to cope with things is not too great. I think you get burned out during childhood of dealing with drama. The drama that comes from your parents issues or the lack of a parent be it mother or father. Drama in your home and then outside it. Abuse being a way of life your whole life. Either physical, emotional or sexual. It is worse when it is all of the above. But as you get into your 50's and the last part of your life and you have raised a family yourself you can look back at your own parents mistakes and be more understanding and forgiving of their mistakes as you reflect on your own.
I refuse to let the past determine my future.
I am going to take the reins.
In the book it speaks about how having a tight pair of pants, or a outfit you try on you can not wear , let it destroy the way you feel about yourself. You are having a wonderful day and try on a pair of jeans or a shirt and they look bad and all those self defeating words come and assault you. Your fat, your ugly, your worthless. How do we get such low self worth that a pair of jeans can take you down? Not anymore not this girl!
I am not going to miss going where I want to due to not having clothes that fit because I don't want to buy a larger size. I am going to buy what fits me feels good and does cut me in half and I am going to go have fun with the time I have left on this world. I am going to embrace my body and my life. I am so grateful to "Women , Food and God" for giving me the slap up side the head I needed.
Time to live, to enjoy and love .